This is it…the last two secrets and I’ve decided to combine them because in ways these two ideas go hand in hand.
Again, if you haven’t read secrets #1-5, go scroll down or click here so you catch up!
Forest Gump says, “Life is like a box of chocolates, you never know what you’re gonna get.” This is very true, you have to be open and willing to take what comes your way and make it work for you. At the same time, I also believe, “Life is like walking on a never-ending tightrope, it’s all about balance.”
This is why I combined these last two secrets because in life you need to make plans and take action if you want to get anyway and there will also be times when the best the thing you can do is stop worrying about yourself.
This is why I say it’s like walking a tightrope because when you find yourself leaning too far in one direction (planning too much or not planning at all) it’s important to become aware of it and work towards shifting your thinking back into balance.
Check out secrets #6 and #7:
Secret #6 :You don’t need a 5-year plan, just some kind of plan
I’ve noticed among the young adults I work with there are two different groups. There’s the group that believes they need to have a solid multi-year plan to ensure they reach their desired destination by age 30.
Then there’s the other group. This group hates the idea of having any kind of plan. Their plan is to have no plan until they reach 30 and then they’re going to start making plans.
You’re going to change and grow so much in the next couple of years, there’s no way you’re going to be able to stick to the plan you developed at 18 or 22. At the same time, not having any kind of plan keeps you jumping from idea to idea, job to job with no time to really develop the skills and knowledge you need to make an informed decision.
Sit down and write out your future goals. Make a list of the kinds of jobs you’ve had in the past that you liked and the ones you disliked. Do the same for relationships, cities, friends, etc. If there’s a particular career or city you want to check out, create a plan of how you’re going to learn more about that career or city. If you don’t, it will remain an idea or notion.
Secret #7: Get over yourself already! Once you’ve figured some things out, stop worrying about your future and go do some good in the world.
There will be times in our life when we’re just waiting. Waiting for graduate school to start, waiting to see if we get the promotion we were promised, waiting to see if our partner is going to take a job across the country or not. We’ve made our decision or we’re waiting for someone else’s decision and we’ve done all the internal soul-searching work we can do.
So now what?
Usually we end up going in circles and questioning our decisions and choices. We then go in circles about the other person’s decisions and (here’s that phrase again) “what if” ourselves to death. When you find yourself in this place, the best thing to do is to stop looking inward and start focusing your energy outward.
Worrying and ruminating about the future is not going to make the future come any faster nor is it going to make you feel better. If you’re someone who tends to overthink and worry too much, the best thing you can do for yourself is by helping someone else.
Volunteer for an organization you love or walk around your neighborhood and see if there’s anything you can do to make your environment more beautiful and welcoming. Whatever you decide to do with your time make sure it’s in service of someone else.
It can be tough to know when it’s best for your energy to go outwards vs. inwards.
As a rule, if you find yourself just aimlessly wandering around and you’re unclear what you’re doing, then it’s time to look inward. If you know what you want and you’re on the path, the best thing to do for your anxiety and stress is to look outward.
This is why life feels like walking on a tightrope; you have to keep checking in with yourself in order to stay balanced!
Phew…that’s it…all seven secrets. What do you think? Write me a comment or email me at email@example.com to tell me if I got it right.